Adult Recreational Sports into the Fray

Adult recreational sports are the topic of the week. More and more violence is being reported in adult leagues and even pickup games. Many people have weighed in on the subject. I feel that they have made some excellent points but I think we need to look at the root of the problem. Could it be that having children play one sport year round is starting to manifest itself in adults who went through the system?

            There certainly is a connection. The same people who were playing one sport year round over the last couple of decades are now playing adult sports.

            Where it used to be a player who was not very good would buy the expensive jersey or even whole uniform and put his own name on the back. He might even put a big “C” on the front of his jersey and go out and play. All of us playing saw this outfit as a warning sign to be careful around this guy. He whacked his way around the ice and was generally the worst player out there.

            I have been to pick up games and adult league games over the last few years and I am stunned to say the least. Violence and total disregard for the safety and well being of teammates and opposing players is manifesting itself. I continually here friends say they have stopped playing their favorite sport because they want to go work the next morning without any resulting injuries from the night before lingering.

            Soon, you will see on my website an interview with Clint Campbell ex Montreal Junior Canadien center, and Colgate University hockey player explain what he has seen in adult recreational sports and why he thinks so many guys are quitting.

            It is my opinion that this phenomenon can be attributed to a great deal from the one sport year round hang over. What happened was these children, now grown up, were told repeatedly that they would get a DI scholarship by those around them. They practiced, played hundred of games, and sometimes traveled all over the country only to see that they did not have the talent to play at the next level. They paid, or their families paid the equivalent of a Mercedes Benz and ended up with a Yugo.

             These athletes were told they were elite when really all they were was the best of who could afford to pay. They perceived value in what they were doing. The thought was more is better. If you buy a more expensive car it is worth more. The same does not hold true for youth sports. Some of the best athletes in the world did not play organized sports until they were 12 years old.

            It used to be in a pickup game that the two sides would make sure they game was pretty close and competitive. If you were ahead of my team by a large margin in the first ten minutes of the game the ‘captains of each team would meet, make a trade of a couple of players to even things out and start over. Now that is not always the case. I have seen more and more pick up games where one team wants to have as many of the best players available and will crush the other team to the greatest extent possible.

This is not competition as we know it. It is just another example of the long term effects of playing one sport year round that most people don’t see. Because, as parents, we are no longer attending those games, and don’t see what is happening or effecting our children after they leave us. Well, I have seen a few parents at these games, but that is a different topic for a different time.  You do remember how much frustration and angst was present in the games you watched as your children were growing up? Did you really think there would not be consequences in the future? Or did you not even think of it? Either way it’s here now and must be looked and possibly attached as a cause and effect correlation to the out of control world of youth sports.

            You know what the number one growth sports are for adults in the United States? Whiffle ball. You know why? It’s fun. I can take a person who has never played whiffle ball and if you give me five minutes with them I can show them how to do some really nasty things to a whiffle ball when they pitched it to a batter. Conversely I could have the greatest stud baseball player and either makes him look silly with a pitch or even if he cranked it, have the ball travel about fifty feet. Its fun to play whiffle ball and boys and girl can PLAY together and have FUN!

quietly getting better

Frozenshorts was active again in the youth sports this month. This time it was working with urban children in a semi tournament environment. Children were brought together for academics and athletics to help prepare them and give them a head start towards high school. These mostly eighth graders were formed into teams for different sports including, baseball, soccer, basketball, and touch football.

                This program has been around for quite some time and really has shown a benefit to the children and the community. The children study academics in the morning which include Social Studies, English and Math. After that they had lunch and participated in some activities before having some free time to play in an open gym environment.

                The Social Studies class I taught took a decidedly different twist as to what the children were going to study. We started out with a short movie about the declaration of independence, move on to the Civil War. We connected both of those events to Frederick Douglas, the Civil Rights movement in the 1960’s, The Viet Nam War, and finally this year’s Presidential Election.

They had a debate over the North and South in the Civil War and also a Presidential debate which they then presented to the rest of the children in the other Social Studies class in the form of a campaign speech. We then held a general election on the last day of class.

                The children made up a list of ten things that they thought were important about the Declaration of Independence and the people who signed them. The list was covered up and then with each subsequent event in American History, we went back and found how those things the children put up on their lists were still relevant to each new event.

                You see it was the journey that was important. How was civil disobedience manifested, and in what form throughout the history of the United Sates? How could they learn from these events and apply the ideas and thoughts they had on their lists to their life today. How important it was to listen to what others had to say and try to understand their point of view if not necessarily agreeing with them.

                Now for the sports parts. Because of the interviews I have been doing with athletes and coaches I was unable to attend some of the sporting events. When I did I was mostly and observer. I wanted to watch and see what was happening.

                Here goes. In the basketball tournament I was observing a lot of coaching of the players. It seemed the coaches were being quite competitive for the games and some kids, unfortunately were not getting a lot of playing time. A coach yelled at a player to “get his head into the game” while another said to kids “you’re embarrassing yourselves out there.”

                One coach, however, made a list of all his players and the substitution pattern so that each kid got equal playing time.

                 We had a young man on our team who was a ball hog. He was “High Stepping” while he dribbled and was causing quite a bit of consternation with the head coach and the other players on the team. He would get yelled at, but continued to play and individual style of play. Finally I pulled him aside after. I told him that it did not look like he was having much fun, nor were his teammates. There seemed to be stress and angst everywhere on the court and sidelines. I suggested to him a solution to his problem. Why didn’t he pass the ball to the other players and get them involved. While the other team was guarding the guy with the ball, he could run free to get open and use his speed to create an opening in the defense and to create a little confusion. He looked at me a little funny but agreed to try it. The first time he passed the ball the other player wasn’t ready to receive it. Why, because he was not used to this young man passing the ball unless he was blocked or guarded to closely to continue to dribble.

He gave me a look on the sideline as if to say, “See, that’s why I don’t pass.” I calmly told him to relax and to tell another boy that he would be passing him the ball the next time he got it. Things started to click. On the last play of the game this young man passed the ball and broke for the basket, along home run passed nestled cleanly into his hands and he put up the winning shot.

                In our homeroom on the last day of class I asked this man what he had learned and he said teamwork was for fun, the team played better, and he enjoyed playing basketball now instead of it being so difficult.

                During the football tournament, things did not go so smoothly. We did not have a true quarterback and had to take out lumps. I suggested to our head coach that he give one of the players a try at the position as he was throwing the ball well during open gym. The kid was a little nervous and at first said he did not want to do it. In the next game he changed his mind and gave it a try. In the very first series of downs on the very first play, he threw an interception and you could see he did not want to try that again. However he did catch the game winning ball in the end zone and lit up like a Christmas tree.

Another boy was given a chance to quarterback. He panicked and dropped the ball. However in the last series of downs he made an interception to end the other teams’ final drive.

The last boy to quarterback certainly had the talent. He complained though that receivers weren’t getting open and that they were not catching the ball when it was thrown to them. I pulled him aside ad quietly suggested that he tell the guys to look quickly for a pass when they left the line of scrimmage.  First pass incomplete, and then it started. Three touchdown drives in a row.  Quick short passes to different kids with smiles all around. After the game he came over to me and smiled. I asked if he had fun, it was not the question he thought I was going to ask. He said “yes”, I said” good.”

                At the end of the school semester I gathered three of the young men around me and asked them if when they take a test in school if the teacher stood over them yelling instructions to them and telling them what to do? All three shook their heads no. I then asked why then should coaches do it to them during a game or practice? All three looked at each other and then one said to me, “I never thought of it that way.”

                There are now five athletes who are going to play youth sports differently than they would have before they were shown the Frozen Shorts way. We take baby steps, little baby steps, but those five guys, and maybe not all five, will now have a clear vision on how important it is to have fun when they play youth sports. And they will show others the way, and so forth and so on….and so it goes.

A quarter of the Time

Youth sports. You would think that the name would bring a smile to your face and thoughts of past fun and friends. But once again I have been involved in a drama that has played out on a field of six-year-old soccer players. The two coaches involved here have good intentions. However, it is the subjectivity involved in their decisions that brings the children’s long-term best interest into question.

          What is it that drives a person to hold onto their position as a coach so tightly? Are they dissatisfied with their life and their work situation? Have they been screwed over in their life and are trying to make sure that the same thing does not happen to their children? Is it the fact that they have seen other kids being screwed, and so they think they can do better than that coach did? Do they watch coaches on T.V. and yearn for the same status that professional and DI coaches have?

          This next scenario played out in a six-year-old house soccer league. We came in and made a presentation to the B.O.D. They liked what we had to say. Their season had already started, just practices, and there was some question as to whether this would disrupt the current staff’s coaching. I was more concerned that someone believed that the coach of a six-year-old house soccer team could be interrupted, but I digress.

          I went to one practice, and to say it went well would be an understatement. The kids loved our play for fun scenario. The coaches enjoyed the way the kids had so much fun. The Director saw what we were doing and was pleased. The parents commented on how much fun the kids had and how much soccer they got to play.

          Essentially, we let the kids play “Simon Says” with the coach and “Hokey Pokey” as a team, until finally they played a short sided game. Great fun was had by all. Well, the coach had to run a lot. I told the kids at the end of the “Simon Says” game, that “Simon Says” chase the coach!! Without knowing, it they learned to stop and start, change directions, balance, and a little upper body strength as the coach let them tackle her. It was wonderful.

           I approached two of the other coaches in the league about what we were doing and to put it lightly, they were not pleased. The first coach told me that his son was going to play in a big hockey tournament in Canada the next weekend, and that he was selected by an ex-DI coach. There were kids from three different organizations going up for this “big” tournament. When I stated there were no big tournaments in July for hockey, the coach became indignant. I then told him that these kids were not the best kids from the area, just the kids whose families could afford to pay to go to Canada. What happened next floored me. The coach said that he could not afford to go to the tournament and had to skip a $500 mortgage payment to make the trip. His son was the goalie, and if he didn’t have this structure, he would be running around on the ice hitting the kids with his stick.

          One side note. This coach’s son played the whole game, every game, and played most of the game at the top striker position. When a water break was called, he was the only player to not join the rest of his teammates in a circle. A coincidence, I think not. The other kids shared the playing time.

          The other coach took great offense to my approach also. She thought she was hired to coach these kids and that was just what she was going to do.  She inquired if my approach allowed them to play a championship game at the end of the season.

          I watched them play a game against each other. There were four quarters of eight minutes played. I kept track of the actual time played on a stopwatch. They averaged less than three minutes a quarter. During the first half they shouted approximately 27 commands to the children, ones that were not cheering and encouragement.

           After the game was over we tried to have the children play a fun game. It seems that the parents had been tipped off and some chose not to have their kids play. Before our game started, the coach said to everyone, “I really don’t know what is going on, and of course you do not have to stay”. The other coach told the kids on multiple occasions not to hurt the parents when they kicked the ball in to the goals. It was an absolute disaster, except for the fact that a couple of kids had a grand old time kicking and running around.

         

           

         

GUEST BLOG WAYNE WILSON

After captaining the Bowling Green Falcons to the NCAA Division I championship in 1984, I decided to forego a professional hockey career so I could begin coaching. And that’s what I’ve done ever since – serving as an assistant at my alma mater for nine years while earning my master’s degree, before becoming head coach at Rochester Institute of Technology a dozen years ago.

                Along the way, I’ve had the privilege of coaching and teaching a lot of hard-working student athletes, not only about hockey, but about life. We attempt to recruit high-character kids who are good teammates and dedicated students. That’s contributed greatly to the success RIT has had while making the transition from Division III to Division I. Two years ago, we wound up stunning the college hockey world by reaching the Frozen Four. That was sweet, but I was just as proud – if not more so – of our team’s 3.2 grade point average, pretty impressive when you consider that RIT is a very demanding academic school.

                About five years ago, I had the privilege of meeting V.J. Stanley, when he began broadcasting our hockey games. The thing I liked right away about him was that he took a different approach to the coverage of our team. It wasn’t just about hockey with him. It also was about academics and life-skill development. He was very thorough in doing his homework about our program and I and my staff enjoyed being interviewed by him as a result. It got to the point where we even invited V.J. to one of our video review sessions.

                V.J. wound up developing, writing and narrating a documentary about our program that included interviews with everyone, including the Zamboni driver. (I wasn’t kidding when I said he was thorough.)

                I believe one of the reasons I hit it off with him was that V.J. had been a successful hockey coach in his own right at the University of Rochester for 21 years. He not only knew the game, but also emphasized academics and balanced excellence. When asked about his coaching record, he didn’t recite how many victories or league championships he had won, but rather how many doctors, lawyers and engineers his team had graduated. I liked that.

                So, when he asked to interview me for this book and other projects involving youth sports, I was more than happy to contribute whatever I could. We both realize that youth sports is broken and needs to be fixed.

                Like me, V.J. believes that the primary goal of youth sports should be kids having fun. The fact that nearly 70 percent of kids quit organized sports by age 13 is alarming to me, a true crisis. Or, as V.J. has eloquently and accurately put it, a tsunami that needs to be stopped.

                We have to get back to the play-for-fun approach. Children, twelve and under, should receive equal playing time so they can develop and enjoy the best that sport has to offer. They can’t develop if they are in constant fear of being benched.

                Somewhere along the way, specialization took over youth sports, and now we have too many kids at a young age being forced to play one sport, year-round. This, too, needs to stop. Growing up in Canada, my parents encouraged me to play several different sports. I believe that this balanced-excellence approach, in which you take breaks from your primary sport, is absolutely necessary and actually aids in a young athlete’s physical, mental and emotional development on and off the rink, field and court. I didn’t focus solely on hockey until I was 16, and even then, there were months at a time, where you took a break and weren’t on the ice.

                During my two decades of coaching and recruiting, I’ve noticed a proliferation in so-called “elite” programs, travel teams and show-case tournaments, while the number of Division I scholarships has pretty much remained stagnant. As V.J. has noted, the carrot of DI scholarships and, even worst, this long-shot dream of playing professionally has created unrealistic expectations and is sucking the joy out of youth sports.

                V.J.’s book and video tapes take a look at this youth sports tsunami from many different angles and shows how this new paradigm simply isn’t working. He has talked to scores of experts in the field – doctors, coaches, athletes and administrators – and offers common-sense solutions to how we can fix these problems, which have reached epidemic proportions.

                He reminds us that we need to get back to the simple mantra that youth sports should be fun, not seen as a path to a Division I scholarship or a pro career. And he reminds us that young people, in particular, need to seek balanced excellence in their lives in order to become well-rounded, fully developed people.

                I think this book is a great starting point and a great how-to-guide. It can help us stop the tsunami in youth sports and make children the focal point of youth sports once more.

                I hope you enjoy the book and learn from it. It definitely will be worth your while.

                Sincerely,

                Wayne Wilson

                2010 N.C.A.A. Division I Hockey Coach of the Year

                2001 N.C.A.A. Division III Hockey Coach of the Year

    

GUEST BLOG Frank Forencich

How Good Can I Be?

I had the good fortune to meet a young lady and her family during my journey through this project.  I had met her brother first and he was quite pleased with his younger sister’s athletic accomplishments.  He really caught my attention when he started talking about scholarships.  It seems his sister had been approached about playing DI tennis by a college coach.  Now let me make this clear:  a student must graduate from their junior year and pass the NCAA clearing house before they can be offered or accept a legitimate DI athletic scholarship. A student or family can say the intend to go to a DI college but the NCAA has very specific rules regarding athletic scholarships.

                I was invited by the parents to come to their house.  We had a very good conversation about athletics, coaches, tournaments, and showcases.  In my consulting business, I call it Mental Health Consulting; I frequently talk to parents, coaches, and athletes in youth sports.  What struck me about this family was the closeness they had sitting around the kitchen table.  You could feel the honest caring for their daughter’s health and well being.

                This spring she is going to play tennis against the boys.  Here is how I know she will be successful.  I watched her play one match.  Even before the match started I could tell by the way she carried herself walking on to the court she had class.  I turned to her mom during warm-ups and said, “She’s going to win.”  Even after she lost the first game, the outcome was obvious.  But then she did something quite memorable.  She bounced the ball on the side edge of the racket not to show off but to help her concentration.  You can see DI athletics pretty clearly pretty quickly.  She had a steel-eyed determination that was a joy to watch.  There wasn’t any show boating or any flare-ups of behavior.  When she missed a shot, the mom and the grandparents sat and watched and cheered nicely.

                 You see, you can’t buy DI talent.  You either have it or you don’t. True athletic talent is evident very quickly after puberty. There are however, many late bloomers out there who need time, encouragement, and repeated opportunities to compete in games to achieve their level of excellence.

                 The parents did not send her to Florida to live and play at an academy.  I am sure there were overtures for her to attend such a place. These academies are prevalent in all sports.  Do players and families have all the facts needed to make a decision on where and what kind of atmosphere is best for their child’s long term health and development?

                They remained grounded and so did this young athlete.

                As she plays against the boys this spring, she is accepting a challenge based on competition, not gender or what is popular.  Instead of fearing competition, or trying to stack the deck to win, she embracing the challenge of finding out how good she really is in this arena. Notice I did not say who is the best.  The truly great athletes play against their sport.  The opponent is merely an obstacle or a measuring stick as to how well they can play and compete.  She has the look and pace of a class human being, and I am sure she will be successful in whatever endeavor she chooses to accept in her journey through life. Not just because of talent. It is way more important for her future success to have an excellent work ethic, a grounded base of integrity and humility, and a passion for life and fun.
                                              Now isn't that what is really important?

THE HIGH COST OF PLAYING AND COACHING TO WIN

                A coach told a freshman player that he would be in his high school team’s top “20” as a freshman soccer player. He even told the player’s father that his son was going to make the team.  The player had a great camp, but was cut. Let me make this clear. If a varsity coach is going to keep a freshman or a sophomore on his team, they must play at least 50% of the time, and should be in the starting lineup every other game. When the father questioned the coach about keeping his word, the coach blamed “administrative reasons” for cutting the player. Asked by the coach if the player was still playing baseball, even though the father was told it was not a problem, the father was stunned. The coach asked where the player had been. Why wasn’t he at the pre-season pay-for-play training camp?

                The player was the best player on the junior varsity team, according to both junior varsity coaches. (Not the most talented) The next year, the boy got sick during tryouts. The excuse given for the player not making the team was that he was three weeks behind. It was only one week. The next excuse was that they hadn’t seen him play a certain position in three years. This was not true, either. The junior varsity coach had seen him that summer in a game at the club team’s state championship. They also said he had not been seen at the position they needed. Also, not true. The junior varsity coach had seen this boy “stuff” the leading scorer on another team in a couple of games. The same scorer crushed the varsity team with three in a scrimmage for three goals.

                This is happening more than you realize. Attitudes developed from ego and self-worth are being enhanced for the coach instead of the player’s development. In the sectional championship game, another player on the varsity team was in that same position this young man played. He gave up another bad goal. Meanwhile, the wronged player led his junior varsity team with three goals and fifteen assists, and was the captain of the undefeated junior varsity team.

                No championships were won that year or in the following four years. Coaches need to realize that the children want to play. Some players follow the “party line” and say they play to win, but after their careers are over most of the ones I talk to regret not getting to play. We polled about a hundred kids from the age of fourteen to eighteen. I was shocked at the amount of kids who said the reason they played sports was to win. I was even more shocked when I was told most would rather sit on the bench and win a championship, than to play on a losing team. This bothered me for quite a while.

                 And then a strange thing happened. I started running into some of the players who I had polled. ALL wanted to change their answer after their season had finished and they did not win a championship. They all said they now realize it would have been more fun to play. In one case we studied, a player who had rarely played refused to go into the game in the final minutes of a blow out in the last game of his high school career. This scenario plays out year after year, season after season, sport after sport.

                Playing ALL the kids on your roster during the season is a HUGE benefit to your team, not a hindrance. Inter team competition helps the WHOLE team get better. It may not seem like playing your most talented players is entitlement, but it is. They have to earn extended playing time, and keep earning it. If not they learn subconsciously that they don’t have to play their best and try their hardest to get playing time.

                Over and over in multiple sports we see coaches keeping their “best” players in games and losing without seeing the long term negative effect it has on their program. Players who do not get playing time start to lose interest and don’t play hard in practice. This falsely justifies the coaches’ thoughts that the player does not deserve playing time. The coach created this scenario by not allowing kids repeated chances to play and get better during games with real playing time, not just a few minutes at the end of a blowout. I have also seen kids get playing time at the end of a blowout and play really well. Then, during the next game, they are back on the bench. Most coaches do not realize the long term harmful effect this has on their program. The kids do not want to be on a team were they are stereo typed as a bench player or substitute. We followed a basketball team from freshmen to senior year. Only three kids who played on the freshmen team were on the varsity squad their senior year.

                 Post puberty it should be play by performance. That means when a player is not playing his best they are replaced by a player who may not be able to contribute as much as the more talented player in the short term. Both kinds of players should get repeated chances during games to play. The more talented player learns that they have to perform at a high level to keep their position and status, it is not a given.  They learn the benefits of getting better and being a good teammate. The benefit to the team, the coach, and the player are long lasting and beneficial, not harmful. The substitutes are rewarded for their efforts and try harder making themselves and all around them better. They also show anyone watching, that they have a chance to succeed.

                Now is the time to stop the tsunami.