Living Vicariously

I met another family bragging about their son getting a full athletic scholarship to play Division I sports. Funny how they did not mention the 2 letters he would have to receive from the college. They did not mention the grant in aid letter, nor did they mention the letter of intent.  I am also curious as to why they did not mention the $50 they had to send to the NCAA clearing house. Nor did they mention the clearing house # you get to be able to accept an athletic scholarship. No announcement on any social media was made. Curious as to why they wouldn’t be talking about either letter being framed and hung on a wall on their house.

I am amused as the excuses or reasons come out.. We have heard them all. He didn’t like the coach. He got injured.  It was too far away.  My favorite, it was not a good academic fit. Am I supposed to believe that a kid playing one sport year round for 8 years, attending showcases, and DI camps, suddenly doesn’t want to accept a DI full ride athletic scholarship if offered?

In this case it was not a good academic fit. That is why he did not go there they said. And I wonder what his coach thinks after having gone through all the effort to get  this young man a scholarship only to have him turn it down.

Now on the surface, this may not seem to be a big deal. BUT in today’s world of high stakes youth and high school sports it is a big deal. Here is why. First off the kid may be living a lie. Second, kids who have seen him play will think they are as good as him and they and their parents will spend time and money on a race that doesn’t exist to get an athletic scholarship.  Also, does his present coach not stop the lie because it helps fill his camps? Do these camps perpetuate the myth of playing one sport year round, showcases, and elite trainers, and teams?

There will be no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. We see it every day. There is a tremendous hang over for these kids and parents when their child has to go through this.

 We want the kids to be safe mentally and physically.  Their long term health should be a priority. They should be having fun. We want them to  be active longer, and learn transferrable life lessons.

We need to stop the tsunami in youth and high school sports

EPTU

EPTU. I heard from a coach that equal play under 10 rewards kids who don’t want to work and put in the effort. They are kids, not micro adults. Embrace their age appropriate desire for FUN. It should be an integral part of your coaching philosophy. Or is just a word you throw around to appease your conscience? Had a coach tell me Kobe does it that way when he's trying to win a game. Well coach your player is not Kobe and never will be. He’s a high school student. Teach him that way.  Imitating what the pros do in practice and games does not apply to 99% of the children playing youth and HS sports. So why do it? Make 2 equal teams in practice and let them play. No interference from coaches for correction sake. It enhances  good competition and fun. This concept  embraces what the athletes do naturally as children  which may help your team improve more than packaged drills from a DI or Pro coach. Remember, they are not  mini pro athletes. Maybe a coach could watch his or her team play before practice starts and learn what the players enjoy doing and create drills around that free play. Free play, most underutilized "drill" in all of youth sports and high school sports.

Injuries to multi sport athletes

During a recent mentoring session with a coach he asked if back in my day, we had kids miss a whole season with an injury. I said it rarely happened. Most of the time when it did it was an accident. Somebody tripped over something, or they ran into something and got hurt. Occasionally, and I remember it happening once in high school, did I see a player get hurt during a game that caused him to miss the rest of the season.

But today, you see or hear about it often. With 3000 kids a day going to emergency room for sports related injuries, and so many more kids playing youth and high school sports, it is no surprise that the amount of injuries has increased to children playing sports. Single sport athletes are 2-8 times more likely to get injured than multi sport athletes according to AAOSM.

He then said he knew a multi sport athlete that had 2 knee operations and at 16 was now facing more rehabilitation for his latest injury.

I told him that one of trends I was witnessing in youth and high school sports was kids playing on the edge or over it. In the last soccer game I watched, two kids go up for a header and the one kid, who was not going to get the ball recklessly slammed his head into the other player breaking his nose. I saw a hockey player take 5 strides and slam a kid into the boards separating his shoulder.

One of the most important things we are trying to teach at our talks, seminars, and workshops is community. Play hard but fair. Opponents should be able trust the opposing players in a game, or even their own players in practice not to do something stupid. Parent should not encourage this behavior in the stands or on the way to the game in the car. They should not congratulate their kids in the car on the way home either. They should say to their kids that sportsmanship and class are an important part of youth and high school sports

Paycheck and Taxes

Is it about the paycheck and taxes?

Since it’s Labor Day, let’s talk about working, paychecks, and taxes. In this day and age of youth and high school sports, I am struck by the similarities between our children’s new era of “play” and a job. If put into business terms, it seems that youth sports organizations are issuing taxes and parents are paying these taxes without either side being fully aware of the actual physical drain on their “bank” accounts.  These taxes, like almost all taxes, are adding so much outside negative stress that it has become increasingly difficult to keep your “head above  water” in this mythical race that does not exist in youth and high school sports.

 Now most people work for the paycheck, I understand that. I did it for many years and did not feel satisfied, so I change my approach drastically.

By “paycheck” we mean the earnings of the banners, trophies, elevated status, and ego of playing for “elite” travel teams. You add to this the race for the mythical full ride athletic scholarship and it’s a heavy “tax” but these kids and parents today have so much invested in play that the play has turned into a job.  The parents are paying “taxes” to youth and club organizations out of this new “paycheck”.  As we all know, if you are paying taxes, you want some tangible services returned to you. The more taxes that you pay, the more and better services you demand. This is not happening.  You are now in a culture where you are paying more in taxes than you will ever get back. Truly a “life time tax”.

Is it really about the paycheck/victory?  Do organizations and parents want to earn the “paycheck” of banners, the “paycheck” of trophies, the “paycheck” of elite travel status, and the elevated ego “paycheck” of more is better? Do they not see the long term cost in life, work, relationships, and families?

Maybe you need a vacation? Maybe you need to start your own business? And by vacation, I mean rest and quality family time. By your own business I mean free play and pick up games.

It’s a simple business plan, just not so easy to implement.